Vulnerability is difficult. Writing this is difficult. I hope it is received with the intentions it is delivered. Please do not be angry at me for what I am about to say. Hear me out, before you dismiss me. Show me grace and love, and pass no harsh judgement.
Mother's Day is my least favorite celebration of the year.
DO NOT MISUNDERSTAND. It is not about my mom, but about me.
Never does a holiday remind you more that you are not a mom. I walk into the store, and people wish me a Happy Mother's Day. They assume because of my age, I have children. They assume, because I am a woman, I have children. What they never assume is that I could never conceive, and 364 days of the year, it effects me little. But that one day, that one day we call Mother's Day, is the one day I would rather sleep through the day.
What's more difficult is that my Mom is great. Many of you have met her. Many have seen her on my lives or see her commenting. She is precious, innocent, and kind. She loves Jesus, my dad, her kids/grands/soon-to-be great grand, and her family. She holds her friendships near and dear and her loyalty is unmatchable.
She deserves to be honored on that day. Cherished. Celebrated. And I do my very best to rise up, but it's the one day I fail most.
I can't be the only person who feels this way. I can't be the only one who struggles on Mother's Day. Perhaps you never had a mother. Perhaps your maternal figure was dysfunctional, and you never knew what a mother was supposed to look like. Perhaps your mother was precious but has passed. I am sure your heart yearns for her. Perhaps you wanted children but could never conceive. Perhaps you have lost children. Or life's decisions resulted in not having kids. The scenario possibilities of motherhood/non-motherhood are endless. Yet one thing is for sure: Someone played the motherly role in your life.
Perhaps it was for a season. Perhaps it was for a lifetime. Perhaps in a moment, someone treated you as a mother should, and you remember that moment with a smile.
This year, I want to embrace Mother's Day in a better way than I have in the past, I want to forget I am not a mother, and instead focus on other's who have mothered. Being a mother doesn't entitle a person to be good at it, so sometimes mothers are not mothers at all, but people who have impacted your life.
I asked women through Facebook to tell me their story: "WHO made you feel that motherly love?" I wanted to sit back and read as people shared with me about their moments, their person, who impacted their life. It could be a mother. Or perhaps it was a sister, a friend, an aunt, a Sunday School teacher.
And I received some of the most precious stories. So precious, I had to share with you! And, I have included my mama in the comments below too!
Before we get there, I do want to share with you about how I was raised - and how it connects to my mama. You see, mom insisted we go to church as kids - made us go. My whole family went - grands, parents, steps, siblings. Sometimes kicking and screaming I went. Sometimes gladly I went. I grew up in the youth group, doing church things, Christian concerts, youth camps...because my Mama made me. And, I grew up Talking to Jesus, thanks to my Mama. Listen to the song.
HERE IS TO ALL THE MOTHER FIGURES OUT THERE WHO HAVE HELPED SHAPED
THE F WORD WOMEN THAT WE ALL ARE!
fabulous fierce fire fantastic flirty forgiving forever friend
Jan (my dear friend)
Shared by Sheila Logan
I haven't known her for a lifetime but it sure seems like it. We just clicked 5 and half years ago. She is so dear to me, always there for me, knowing what to say or do when I need it. Life has been a roller coaster, including the loss of my BF less than a year ago. She kept me together and continues to do so. Happy Mother's Day, Jan. I love you lady..
(Mama) LueNell Carter Shared by Sheila Logan
My boys spent so much time with them, fishing and hunting. Unfortunately she passed away at 58 years of age in January 2001, 20 yrs ago. I cherish the time I had her, she was loving, giving. I miss her every day. Happy Mother's Day in Heaven Mama. I love you..
Lois Hulsey
Shared by Dawn Bankston
She has always been a hard worker. She shows strength, that I can only hope for. Since the passing of my dad, she has been my rock. We may not talk to each other every day, but she is always on my mind. We haven't always seen eye to eye, but as i get older, i finally see her point of view. She is a blessing to have in my life. I am honored to call her mama. I love her to pieces!
Momma Shared by Teresa Chism – Momma Dear Mom,
There are so many things one could say about you.
About how hard you worked to provide for each one of us 6 kids.
About the time you've sacrificed.
About the love you've poured out.
About the lessons you've taught.
Instead, I will simply say thank you. Mom, thanks for everything.
From changing my diapers and teaching me how to walk and talk, to helping me learn to write my name and how to tie my shoes. The lessons I have learned from you cannot be counted. You didn't go to school to become a teacher, but yet you was one. I hope to someday be a fraction of the teacher you have been to me, even though I was in college working on my Nursing degree. The lessons I've learned from you cannot be taught in school.
You taught me to be kind.
You taught me to listen when others speak.
You taught me to try to be the bigger person, even when you really don’t want to be.
You taught me about self worth.
You taught me how to ask questions.
You taught me how to think outside the box, and figure things out on my own.
You taught me to love others.
You taught me to stand up for myself, and what I believe in.
You taught me that hard work is important.
You taught me to value relationships, and that good friends have great value.
You taught me to laugh, when sometimes the only other thing to do is cry.
You taught me that my best is good enough for you.
You taught me to be thankful for what I have been blessed with.
You taught me to see beauty in little things.
You taught me to look out the window on long drives.
You taught me to be humble.
You taught me be strong.
You taught me that life is never going to be easy.
You taught me that riding with the windows down is always a good idea.
You taught me to wear comfy shoes, because blisters just aren’t worth it.
You taught me that I don’t need makeup, but I can wear it if I so desire.
You taught me that a smile is the prettiest thing I could ever wear.
You taught me to go to church.
You taught me to look to the Bible for truth.
Thank You for everything and
without you I would have not been nothing!
Love You Momma🌸
Your Daughter,
Teresa Chism
Jean Kelton
Shared by Lynn McCurdy
My mama, Jean Kelton, has been an angel on earth to all of her kids, grandkids, and great grandkids. She is a loving, caring person who always puts others before herself. The best thing about my mama is how we can always count on her to pray for any needs we may have. Mama, God blessed me with the best!
Vicki Seitz I know I don't have enough room to write....My mother is the most amazing woman, She has strength and determination like no other. Not only did she put all 3 of us girl through girl scouts, she did 50 plus other girls too as a Girl Scout leader. She was a sunday school teacher, she is a mother and a friend. At 9 I almost lost my mother to a drunk driving accident. She by all intense purposes should have died. She suffered with 2 broken legs, a broken back and 4 months in the hospital and dozens of surgeries later, my mom came back fighting. She became and EMT after being told she would never walk again. She taught dozens of school CPR and First aid for these kids to be certified. She wasn't just our mother, she was everyone's. She is 84 today and even though she can no longer walk, she is still the most amazing woman I have ever known, She has daughters and sons that live within 10 miles from her that she never sees, and its not because of covid. She is so lonely. I wish I could have all your ladies write her. Encourage her. She lives in Wisconsin and I am in North Carolina. Its hard for me to get back home to visit with one household income and trying to put my daughter through nursing school. I have left a ton out but all I can say is this woman is a martyr...she is God's Daughter and she has taught me to be humble and kind, to love and help others, treat them as you want to be treated. She has so much compassion and honesty. She would give the shirt off her back and then some. I don't know why, writing this, I can smell her molasses cookies...I miss my mommy!!!
Jimmie Henderson
Shared by Sylvia Boree
I lost my sweet Mama in 1996. She was the best cook and could sew anything without a pattern. With 8 kids she never raised her voice. She always listened and gave advice that you took because it was good advice. Love and miss her everyday 😞
Lisa Green
Shared by Jennifer Casper
This woman is one of the strongest people I know. She raised two amazing daughters while working her tail off from sun up to sun down. Even when she was sick and almost died she raised us to be strong, independent women. She will drop anything to help her daughters. She has taught me how to be an amazing mom and I can’t wait to watch her become a Grandmother. I love her and appreciate everything she’s done for me even when sometimes forget to show it.
Sheryl Oechsle
Shared by Sherry Cartledge
My Moma is a very hard working women that had two girls and worked very hard to make sure we always had what we wanted as well as what we needed I was the quiet child and tried not to be much trouble sense she worked a second shift job she also built a house close to her Grandfather so we could help him and he got to live out his life at home instead of a nursing home that was one of the best things my moms did for me because he was my everything she also would send me to church as a young girl with was the best thing she ever did for me I loved going to church every time they had church I was there I still love church I love God and I thank him everyday for my Moma she is the one that made sure I learned about him she also helped me to be who I am today by pretty much raising 2 girls and making sure we were loved and taken care of no matter what she is still working just as hard at 76 if you saw her you would not know her age she is aging well she is good hearted and loves her animals she taught me to respect your elderly and to be kind to people also she taught me no to be greedy and share and help people when you can but most of all she taught me how to love she is a amazing lady and very talented I thank God I still have her
Wanda Lewis
Shared by Lesa Hendon
My mother is the most giving person you will ever meet. She spent her entire life taking care of our family. My dad was crippled she always made sure he was cared for. She sat with him for days on end in the hospital, giving up sleep in spite of being exhausted. When he went on hospice, she never left his side. She always makes sure we are taken care of. She did without many things over the years to provide the best for children and grandchildren. I couldn’t ask for a better mother. She taught me to be independent and strong. I am the woman I am today because of her guidance!!!!
Mom Shared by Susan Spaulding My mom is no longer with me on earth but I know she is with me in spirit, she is my hero and my best friend. She was the one person that I always looked up to, we never had a cross word. She taught me to be kind to everyone, to treat people the way I wanted to be treated. I never remember her saying anything bad or negative about anyone. The world lost this Angel 9 years ago and not one day passes that I don’t think of her and shed a tear or two
I miss her terribly.
Jean Jones Shared by Tammy Jones My mom Jean Jones went to be with Jesus a year ago . I lost my daddy 2,years before her . My Mom was a great mom . She raised 5 girls which I am the middle child . She loved the Lord and was very active in church in singing . She raised us 5 girls in church to sing from our hearts for Jesus . She always thought us to respect people. I remember all my life hearing her pray out loud every night for her girls to get saved and work for the Lord. She was a loving giving mom . She was always giving us can food she worked hard to can , always fighting with you to take money to help me out as a single mom . I did not want to take my momma’s money but she would hide it in my car or suitcase lol. She always cooked 3 meals a day but growing up if you didn’t eat what she cooked you didn’t eat . Which she always had great meals cooked . I was and still am a picky eater lol . Mom was the kind of mom that put her kids before her self . Her Christian life she lived made me who I am today . I miss my dad & mom so much . When dad passed I was a daddy’s girl half my heart left with him but when my mom passed the other part of my heart left to . I’m struggling today without them but I’m happy at the same time for them that they are in Heaven pain free and are very happy I’m sure . Just pray for me that I’ll find away to carry on for my own two kids and 4 grandsons and be the mom and mamaw I need to be for them . Sorry I wrote so much . Here’s a picture of me and my sweet daddy & mom together. It’s not the best picture of us but the last one I had of us together.
Momma
Shared by Angela Hunt
My Momma is truly an amazing woman. She has had her own health issues in the years we were growing up but she would always push through to make sure that us kids were taken care of. She does some of everything from painting their house to gardening and fixing flower beds. She never seems to slow up for herself. I love her so much.
Katherine Garner
Shared by Joan Milford
My Mother was very demanding of her children and did not accept nothing but over and beyond the best from us. As a child this made it very hard to love her but I am so glad she taught how to do anything I wanted to do. How to be a great employee for my employers. I have very mixed emotions but I am so glad I am not a lazy person. She molded a very strong individual. For this I love her.
Linda Day Shared by Beth Hunt My mama is quite amazing. She has raised 4 kids, MULTIPLE grandkids and now she is helping to raise her great grandkids. Taking care of anywhere from 1 to 3 or 4 at a time. On top of taking care of her handicapped brother and also my daddy. Believe me, he's a handful all by himself!
But not only all that, she's always been a mama figure to so many people from neighborhood kids to friends to cousins. Growing up there was always another kid there to feed and care for.
She is our wonder woman, super woman, hero, boo boo fixer, argument settler and the best dog gone biscuit maker around. I could only wish to be the woman she is. I love her bigger than life!
Jackie
Shared by Jenn Sutton
Jackie is not really like my mother, age-wise she's more like a sister. However, it is because of her that I am who I am today. 20 years ago I was freshly divorced with four children all under the age. I didn't have any college education, I didn't really have any job skills, and I wasn't sure what to do with my life now. I thought I would look into daycare for my children to see if it was actually something I could afford without a doctor's degree lol. I contacted Kids Kampus and thought I would give it a go for a tour to see if I could talk to them about this. During the tour I was questioned as to whether I had ever thought about working in the daycare field, I had not but, it sounded like a very good idea because I had a daycare at home of my own children. I interviewed with Miss Denise and received a phone call very quickly that changed my life forever. I was offered a position there, as a teacher's aide. From the first moment that I started working there I knew that this is exactly what I wanted to do with my life. As a child I struggled with being put in remedial classes that made me feel stupid and not worth much. Two of my four children would end up needing IEPs to help them be successful through school. I felt very strongly about children who seem to fall in between the cracks or needed some extra help to help them be successful. I was also very in tune with children who needed to feel good about themselves while receiving the help that they needed. Lastly, I wanted to ensure that these children were supported by their peers and their teachers. It was Jackie who convinced me to go back to school. I began slowly with one class and through her encouragement, and her help with my papers, she built my confidence and also my future. When I got knocked down by illness and autoimmune disease she helped me pick myself right back up and told me how I inspired her by being so strong! Through her leadership, guidance, shared perseverance, love, and support I successfully graduated with an associate's degree, then with a bachelor's degree, and even then with a master's degree. She has opened a whole new world to me by opening my eyes to what I was capable of. I never knew who I really was until I met Jackie and she changed my life forever.
Gee Perlongo
Shared by Keri Dilts
My mom is my best friend. I love getting together with her and her telling tell me stories of her growing up, stories with my dad who she would have been married to for 50 years this year had my dad not passed. She is a strong woman, who has taken care of so many, sacrificing herself. I want her to know i love her to the moon and back and would do anything for her.
These comments were left under our post, and not officially submitted, but they were too good to not share! Shared by Linda J Murphy
My mama is a rest with Jesus. My mama was a strong independent person who can never be replaced .
Shared by Robin Cunard
My mom is one in a million to me and my brother, she works tirelessly and always gives and always has kind words of encouragement and praise, loves her home, her yard and her plants...she's my hero .... I'm so blessed to have her ...
Shared by Gayla Lane
You know my Mama. She calls you her little biscuit maker.
Shared by Melanie Catchings
My Mama lost her battle with cancer when i was 14. But in the few short years i got to spend with her she taught me how to Love Unconditionally. I miss her everyday.
Betty Crocker Tanner
shared by Gee Perlongo
My mother grew up in Balboa, California. Her father was the 1st fire Chief of Balboa/Newport Beach, CA. She was a self taught master cake decorator. She taught many students including me and my daughter Keri to decorate cakes. My father was in the US Air Force and we traveled all over the USA. My mother worked as a Red Cross recreation director at the military hospital in Anchorage, Alaska. My mom taught me how to cook, see, crochet, knit and of course decorate cakes.
Shirley Johnston
shared by Chris Walker
Precious. What's how so many people describe my mother in one word. She loves hard and she loves long. She's loyal, to the point of having best friends for over 40 years, and don't you dare poke the Mama Bear in regards to her kids/grands! She will get vicious! My friends still go see her and spend time with her to this day; I always knew they liked her better!
She spoiled us as children and spoils us as adults. Giving gifts is her love language, and she has always spoiled us with trinkets and treasures, a new shirt (even if on clearance), or a treat. Sometimes, she nails it. Other times...we question her sense of style, like, a ceramic hummingbird she gave me a few years ago, hatching out of its shell. It's partially laying on its side and it has a very thin, fragile beak, as thin as the lead of a mechanical pencil and approximately 4 inches long. It is the ugliest thing ever, and even she agrees now. But I cannot rid of it, as she gifted it to me. So, I devised a plan. I have moved about 6 times (but to only 2 houses, long story) in 8 years. I knew if I tossed the bird loosely in the top of a box, surely, surely it would break and my dilemma would be resolved. No. Such. Luck. The ugly bird still lives, fully intact, thin, fragile beak and all.
We call her mom, mama, and Mother. I call her Mother most, and by her snarl, I think she prefers Mama!
Pictured left to right: sister Apryl, my mom, me, and my niece Sarah.
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